We are comfortable talking about diet and exercise as health issues. We are far more awkward about loneliness, which we tend to file as a sad feeling rather than a health one. The evidence suggests we have that wrong.
What loneliness does to the body
Long-term loneliness is associated with higher risks of heart disease, a weakened immune response, poorer sleep and faster cognitive decline. Some researchers have compared its effect on mortality to that of smoking. This is not to frighten anyone, but to make a point: connection is not a luxury added on top of health. It is part of it.
It is also worth separating two things. Being alone is not the same as being lonely. Plenty of people are content in their own company. Loneliness is the gap between the connection you have and the connection you want.
Small ways to close the gap
Rebuilding connection rarely happens in one grand gesture. It is usually small and repeated.
- A regular low-stakes routine, the same cafe, a class, a walk with a neighbour
- Saying yes to small invitations even when you would rather not
- Reaching out first, since most people are quietly waiting to be asked
- Shared activity, which is often easier than pure socialising
Why it deserves attention
If we treated our social health with a fraction of the seriousness we give our step count, many of us would be better off. It is not soft or self-indulgent to tend your relationships. It is one of the most evidence-backed things you can do for a long and healthy life.